Mamals!

I have had too many peculiar human interactions to log. My odd animal encounters are quite extensive as well, but the weird ones warrant a little recognition:


The tiger:
One lazy afternoon, we motivated and went to the Hyderabadi zoo. Our company had friends in high places and decided to give us a special treat. Me and 4 of my other international buddies were ushered into a humid jail cell with slivers of sunlight. The entire cage was breathing. Before us sat an enormous, beautiful, majestic tiger!! The beast’s breath was causing the walls to vibrate and only a handful of iron bars separated us from massive canines. If I had extended my hand, the tiger could have easily shredded it, but at the same time her fluffy golden coat looked so inviting. The delicate whiskers rested atop such an intense mouth! Its purr vibrated through my whole body! I stood 1 foot away from this beast of a tiger!!!!


The monkeys:
During our exploration of Mumbai, we decided to take a hiatus from the city life and enjoy a ferry ride to Elephanta Island. Elephanta Island is famed for its Dravidian sculptures and cave carvings but ironically has nothing to do with elephants, drats. The island loomed like jurassic park in the smoggy cloak as our boat approached. We stepped off the ferry and began our steep climb through the colorful bazaar, complete with its own magic and Halloween mask shop (how bizarre). Blue tarps shaded our heads from the intense sun, but we couldn’t ignore the odd rustlings and chatterings above our heads. Peering around the tarps we caught our first glimpse of elephanta monkeys! Oh, they were so cute! Dangling from tree limbs, eating bugs from each other’s hair, doing all the stereotypical monkey things-but when you see them in person its completely adorable! I wonder if that is what Indians think when observing our stereotypical American selves? Maybe they are disgusted instead?
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We were sauntering between Elephanta's caves. A couple in front of us was chatting intimately while they walked and swung a grocery bag bulging with snacks. BAM! A monkey roared out of nowhere and ambushed this poor couple. With a ferocious growl and a quite mighty swing of its arm, the monkey ripped the bag from this woman’s clutches. We stood paralyzed 2 feet from this vicious monkey attack hoping to go unnoticed. Alpha monkey had a side kick, scar-face, who suddenly became quite interested in our pack of pupils. Adrian, feeling quite confident in her monkey fending off abilities, charged at the monkey and kicked it. Bad decision. The worst decision. Now scar-face and alpha monkey were lividly gnashing their teeth and lunging in our direction. We scattered! Maybe I should have gotten my rabies shot after all.

We journeyed to Ellora to view some of the greatest monolithic carvings in the world. After extensively exploring the ellora carvings on a ground level, my roommate and I ventured to the top of the escarpment surrounding this magnificent carving to gain a different vantage point. When I popped my head over the flattened upper crust, I saw a monkey. Black faced and calmly enjoying the view. His torso was 2/3 the size of my whole body; a big boy. Sioned surfaced and stood 3 feet from the edge of the cliff capturing the magnificent view through her lens. The monkey, suddenly feeling restless I suppose, began galloping full speed toward Sioned. I jumped in front of the primate as it bounded. I shouted “HEY!!”, growled and waived my arms to distract it from its target, but this animal’s focus could not be broken. Using Sioned as a spring board to round a corner, it leapt into the air and rebounded off her backpack with all four feet. Sioned stumbled forward 1.5ish feet from the brute monkey rebound. Thank goodness she had time to brace herself and was not closer to the edge of the cliff!

The terrain of Hampi is a life size dribble castle. Boulders are piled up to create the most unique looking hills. 600 steps lead travelers up one of Hampi’s tallest hillsides to Hanuman’s temple. We powered up as tens of white tourists slipped down. We chatted with several of them, most of them European, a few Asian. One batch of ladies advised us to keep our food out of sight of the monkeys. Being the birth place of Hanuman, the monkey god, monkeys were known to call this hill home. We paused on a bend in the stairs to feast on the view and feast on our dinkers (our name for the tiny bananas which manage intense potassium, flavor and sugar into such a small package!). We pulled the tiny bananas from Sioned’s bag and didn’t even have time to peel back the skin before a tidal wave of monkeys poured over the boulder side! They were jumping down boulders with such speed and agility! I clenched my fist and made ready to slug any monkey that dared get within the reach of my arm. We saw the fierce banana crazed look in their eyes as they picked up speed. They were closing in on all sides and we paniced! We hurled the dinkers towards their heads just in time to distract them and protect us!


The Dogs:
Lets just say there is one dog at shop com that looks like he is the house pet of a dementor. This dog is walking death. Covered with mange, every bone visible through this poor animal’s translucent skin. I didn’t know mange was a real disease before spending time with the canines of this country. Mange causes an animal to ferociously bite and scratch their skin until their fur is replaced by awful pussy scabs. This awfully sickening sight gives me nightmares.


The cow:
Honestly cow stories are never in short supply, they are bystanders in almost every situation and business transaction, but this is my favorite interaction to date. Picnicking at the meteorite strike site seemed to be the best way to spend our afternoon in Lonar. We settled as a group under a wide brimmed tree to eat our dates, peanut butter sandwiches and oranges. One adorable cow took particular interest in us westerners. She must have found me quite approachable, for she kept whipping her snotty nose on my leg. After exploring each of our pants, it became clear that she was just using us for our snacks. She became quite insistent on sticking her nose in our pb jar. We kept passing the jar between us to make our delicacy a moving target, but she seemed to enjoy the thrill of this game. The safety and purity of our peanut butter was of utmost importance in my mind, so I decided to take more drastic measures. I took a solid stance and shouldered her large ribs. She looked at me with eyes that read “are you kidding?” Unfazed, she still pursued the peanut butter. I was persistent, but so was she. Both driven by the promise of peanut butter, it was a battle of wills. I laid every ounce of force I possessed into her large body time after time. I slowly but forcefully I drove her far enough away so we could eat in peace. The peace only lasted a minute, till we noticed an aggressive ant colony swarming us. Kate’s leg was the only serious casualty (I had to remove and ant with my swiss army knife pliers). We decided to finish our meal on the move.